Sunday, March 26, 2017

sailing the seas of life (self examination)

In all of my life (when looking backwards at what has been) ~
what first comes back to me
is how much I failed
how bad I was there or there
how I lacked this or that in kindness
how I chose angry hurtful actions
over the understanding of self and others.

Some say you have to forgive yourself. 
 It just seems easier to forgive others and not forgive me.   I expected that I should have known yet somehow I did not.

I do not expect I know others well enough
that I can judge them in finality as 
wrong forever.
Any human being can 
improve and do better
if believed in!

Every bad choice I made was made (ignorantly perhaps at the time) out of concern for my self image that was ever so lacking only becuz I had not worked on my self in the area now poorly chosen.  It seems those bad choices then required I do further self examination.

 What does one do when they have examined and adjusted the sails of the ship but a little further on the voyage another ship comes by and yells with their bold beautiful white sails ~ "hey crappy, little dingy with the dirty sails you are going the wrong way!  May my wake punish you for a long time."  

(I have learned punishment does not exact correction but rather promotes angry hurt between both. Punishment does not solve or resolve. It does not build relationships and connections.)

 The initial reaction is to want to give up trying to be better.  BUT that only hurts this little dingy with the dirty sails.  So ~ this ship must go on.  This ship must remember that at the heart remains that LOVE that knows right from wrong and will guide in trimming sails and adjusting sails to sail on.  

I must keep trying for that is the process of living with the Heart of Love as the guide.

1 comment:

  1. Great words! I'm actually dealing with someone sailing one of those boats with clean sails right now.