Tuesday, July 12, 2016

Once Again

The pain of an old relationship's end
brought back to roost by a small flock
with bird diseases that clip their wings

The scapegoat
used to make the few
feel somehow better about themselves
turns out to be a bluebird
with a song that keeps
gurgling up from the chest.


I am not going to stop writing just becuz some people think everything I write is about them or that they can use my words and twist them to then harm me and my relationships with others.

I am a good person.
Many years ago I made a poor choice out of my co dependency
to marry an NPD with BPD.
I had children with that entity.
I have not been with that person for years and years
and my children are grown adults
yet in unpredictable cycles
the meanness comes back with a vengeance through
one or both grown children.

I am now starting yet another new blog. (This One)
I will not make links where those few 
can find and come back here to read
and then screw with me.

I have been poked and tormented
and survived.
I will not be a victim
nor do I need to then victimize
to some how feel good abut myself.

I feel good about myself becuz
 I have worked hard to be a better human being each passing day in this process of living.  
I do not deliberately and maliciously harm others
physically or even at their core hearts.
If it is brought to my attention that I did hurt someone's heart
I do sincerely and genuinely apologize and try harder to improve and not make the same mistake.
I own what I have done ~
the good, the bad, the ugly and the beauty
and even the in between shades.
I do not expect anyone else to fix me.

I do not have to own anyone else's mistakes nor do I have to fix it for them
no matter how much they try to make me
somehow responsible for everything they do
that is not so good,
I am NOT responsible for them!


Now I am going to write from my heart again...
freely.  It is what I do so well and it is
the voice of my spirit that gets to be heard.

If you are reading this rest assured
I am writing again
and I will not be stopped.


  1. :-) A smile for those times when a comment won't do ...

    1. Thank you G!! You are one of several whose support is important to me.